how to impress a lady

A guy figures he is doing something right when the lady asks HIM out. Especially when it is to a sports venue. I mean, let’s face it, free tickets to the big game, and a lovely lady sitting beside you. Must be close to the top of any guy’s list. What could possibly go wrong?

She is coming from the opposite direction and agrees to meet near the stadium. You, being the gentleman that you are, arrive a bit early and are there when she arrives. The two of you make your way to the entrance and the 2 tickets are produced. That’s when the trouble starts.

You glance at the ticket she handed you. Section 530. Row 1. Seat 5.

Section 530? Isn’t that the nose bleed section?

Row 1? Isn’t that at the front edge of the section, with only a very short rail separating you from a 530 foot drop straight down?

By now you must be guessing one of Grandpa Richard’s greatest phobias.


(for those of you less cultured or educated – that is the fear of heights)

You manage to make your way to the seat, where you sit paralyzed for the entire match, trying to deal with cold, clammy palms. At the end of the game you get out safely, but your knees are almost locked up due to over 2 hours sitting clenched.

The bottom line?

Our team won and that very same lovely lady (who now knows you are part wimp) mentions tickets she has for a different venue. One that you know does not have such a precipitous seating arrangement.

Phew! That wasn’t so bad after all.

One Comment

  1. vs says:

    umm, Richard, I think you need a “part 2” to this story….you can’t just start and leave us hanging.

    [G.R. responds: Part 2 has not happened yet! And even when it does, I may leave you hanging due to privacy concerns!!]

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